It’s Not about My Messy Life

The trend—-

It’s about you.

But it’s not about you. So lay your messy life out. Show others what kind of imperfection you own. In the name of being selfless, promote the REAL you. In the name of trendy social media, be un-trendy. Post the makeup-less selfie. Go against the wave of perfection. By making others feel more comfortable about their lives, market your own mess. Be your own person. Make it about you, because it’s not about you.

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The trend—-

It’s edited. It’s a highlight reel. Don’t feel bad about your life. Remember everyone else is fake. Everyone doesn’t have perfect memories, relationships, families, marriages, lives. Everyone is hiding behind social media. Talk about this fact while still on social media. Bash the wonderful photo, because well, it’s wonderful. Put down that person, because well, they showed a highlight. Shame, shame. Because life is messy and fixating on this is the new way to be authentic.  Candid is like gold. A perfectly edited photo: FAKE. Delete them. Don’t even take them.

How—

Did this get so backward?

This “real, transparent” attitude of imperfection is plastered everywhere and it’s intoxicating.

What if—what if?

Instead of going against the tidal wave of edited photos and pretty life moments, I purposefully decided to enjoy the lives my friends are living.

What if–what if?

I shared in their joy, took their happiness as my own, commented kindly, sincerely on the beauty, the laughter, the smiles, and the honest highlights of their lives.

What if–what if?

It wasn’t about fixating on the mess, but deeply enjoying the mountaintops. And shouting a CONGRATS to those on the top when I am in the midst of a valley.

What if–what if?

I delighted–relished—absorbed—cherished—held close the wonder and magic in the lives of my friends.

What if—what if?

It’s not about me at all. Not even the stripped divulging of my mess. Not even the promoting of my world. But the sharing, the sharing of each other. Life to life. Bare of comparison, clothed in the joy of each other.

What if—what if?

I threw back their joy double the size they had initially.

Honestly—

I should care less that its edited. That it looks perfect, pristine, and magical. I should care less if the Newsfeed is full of highlights that look nothing like my current life.

By now, I should be mature enough to inwardly, purposefully accept that life is messy and that my friends don’t have perfect lives. I should be mature enough not to compare my life to the edits. I should be well past the proving of my authentic existence.

I should value—

Knowing who to share parts of my mess with (hint: it’s not the whole world).

Knowing when to share the highlights.

Knowing when to share the tidbits of real in the midst of wonder.

I should remember—

To hold the private moments–both good & bad—in the corners meant for my heart.

To live and cherish my own memories, nurture my personal relationships, and deepen the bonds in my life all without an audience.

Maybe—

I am given a daily chance to cherish the lives of others, and perhaps, this comes through the edited pictures, strings of happy moments, and special milestones posted on social media.

And maybe that’s all OK. It might even be really good.

Because, maybe this is something I was meant to do: delight in the joy of others. 


Previously:

 I Worship My Pain

 My House, Your Heart

 It’s the People Not the Production

 

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13 thoughts on “It’s Not about My Messy Life

    • SierraFedorko says:

      It has been on my mind and I am learning to apply it in my life—it makes life so much more enjoyable when I choose to rejoice with others!!! Not always easy if a valley is underfoot, but so, so worth it. 🙂

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