Beth Bee & the Betrayal of Skirts

Who makes the rules?! That’s what Betha Bee wanted to know. Who says you have to wear skirts to school? Or at all, for that matter. So what if we are in a one-room schoolhouse? Does that mean we have to revert to the ways of women in the 1800s?

Obviously NOT! And so, Betha Bee was rightfully upset about the wearing a skirt to school requirement. It was a stormy day, after all. How was she supposed to hold her books and keep her ridiculous skirt from flying in her face? She has no good solution for the predicament, so please stop asking her questions.

Off she went, more annoyed than usual about wearing a skirt. Nothing about today was turning out to be superstupdendous (and don’t tell me that is a misspelled un-word. It’s real and it means incredibly awesome).

Already in the time I’ve been telling you about made up real words, Betha Bee’s skirt has flown into her face three times. THREE.

Oh, is that Funny Sunny walking in the distance? I don’t know. I CAN’T TELL! The skirt is covering her face. Betha Bee might be able to take a look, if her skirt would just stop blowing around in the wind.

Upon entering the schoolhouse, both girls were in sour milk spirits with no desire to listen to lectures. And although, Miss Lemon had returned (much to the everyone’s delight), neither was very interested in sitting still for hours on end.

We have already spent an uncommonly large amount of time talking about school in these un-stories, so we will happily fast-forward through the boredom.





Betha Bee and Funny Sunny walk out of school, and sneer at Bobby Blue…. simply because he is able to wear pants instead of a skirt. It seemed as though the bad weather only hovered around the two girls. Skirts always exaggerate any situation by at least 10 degrees. So while skirts and hair flew all over the place, Bobby Blue’s wild red hair and pants stayed strictly in order as though no wind could affect him.

Being a girl is incredibly inconvenient almost always, but especially in times of poor weather. So, the wind followed the girls all the way home and when they closed the door to each of their houses…the sky turned blue, the dust settled, the wind stopped, and the happiest of suns began to shine.

We could blame the wind…. or we could blame the curse of a skirt. And in any situation as I have come to observe, a woman will blame the inconvenience of beauty (i.e.…heels, makeup, dresses, accessories etc…).

This kind of blame shifting starts young, so the skirts were to blame as well as the teachers who enforced them, and the poor wind really had no part at all, except to add to the growing hatred of required skirts.

The point of this un-story is really no point at all…except to remind you how HARD it is to be a girl in a world that sometimes forces you to wear a skirt.

Skirts hurt, as Betha Bee likes to say. And I am inclined to agree with her, because I was a girl once, and skirts betrayed me numerous times.

The Betha Bee Dictionary of Words: 

superstupendous: a description of something incredibly AWESOME

>>>>>>>: the fast-forward button for reading

These UN-stories are for EVERYONE. If you would like to draw, send made-up words, OR write to be a part of the fun…. just email!


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